…and the leopard died a painful death…

December 9, 2007

(Time for some MIC press cart style pass-time.. the following post was first made here)

In Hindi the title would have been: Aur CheetaRam Chitt Ho Gaya

Few days back, we were in Gaurav’s room. It was not the first time we were there, but the story we heard, it was first of ‘this’ kind. Which kind? I mean: atthi kind!

Gaurav said to us: Aye Bhaiya, when I was at Sainik school…it was really fun. Aand Elvin you know that that only daring and courageous students can go there to study. But, I think, BESIDES all these you have to be good at study also… said Balu and the same sentence continued with Rahul’s remark: “Chal cahl mujhe pata hai tu bahut tej hai.”Dekh rahe hai Bhaiya, eeelog to Sainik eeskool ko kutch samajhta hi nahi hai,” complained Gaurav and continued: one day I was at night duty and ‘gaive’ everyone instructions about things like where they had to guard the compound-nahi samjhte hai raat ko bahut chor chandal aata hai- and they took there places at night to guard the school. That day it was my turn and I was the group leader. What happens at night I see two lanterns coming from opposite direction, I thought some villagers are going somewhere. Are, bhaiya, raat me unlogon ko bahut kam rahta hai, nahi samjhe” lekin sala bad me to OOO hai na najdik aate gaya…hum to hain na, siti baja diye…sab apna apna positon pakad liya.. I shouted to know if everyone was okie, everyone was fine… I asked the lantern walas who were they, they didn’t reply. Hum to samajh gaye ki beta dal me kutch kala hi nahi pura dal hi kala hai…hum bachpan se hi tej admi…woo humko ka charawega…to samjha na Elvin. There was indeed something fishy about those lanterns.

What I did was I pointed my gun towards those lanterns…my God!, they were the eyes of Cheeta…coming very very slowly towards me. Hum bole ruk beta…aur thian se ek goli matha me mard diya…kya kahen bhaiya…chita jor se chillaya or hare hue pahalwan k tarah chit ho gaya…phir bhi humko dar lage…najdik gaye ek goli aur mar diye..kya pata chita hai na…agar zinda ho jai…Phir sabko siti mar k bula liye…sir bhi aa gaye aur bole: arey tum to bahut bahdur nikla. To samjha na rahul hamse panga mat lena: Hum ne chita ko bhi jeeta hai. No doubt: we were impressed with the story part of the incident!

After two days there comes a series of panic calls from his room: arey balnu, elvin mere room me aao, lagta hai ek chuha mere cot k niche hai. When they went to his room, they found him standing on the bed…and it seemed he was about to hang with the help of the fan to protect himself! Are kya hua…ey to chuha (mane rat) hai…tu to chita maar k aaya hai na: Arre yaar waqt ke nazakat ko samjha karo, hamesa mazak mat karo, us samay mere hath me banduk tha…chalo please mere liye dosti k nate room se chuha Bhaga do…or nahi to ek donali ka banduk la ke do!

Gaurav cheeta kis colour ka tha…sabhi puch rahe hain…likho yahan pe… Gaurav, Press Cart misses you-man. Where the f**k are you man?

 Post by Jeetendra  

6 Responses to “…and the leopard died a painful death…”

  1. | Balu | said

    one addition.. we took the chuha out of the room.. but after that it was gaurav who gave it a tiger(tiger woods) like shot with the broom.. the rat landed in the opposite house occupied by an MIT faculty who had given us a tough time
    (we were celebrating someone b’day.. we were loud.. but y did he have to shout at us for that.. come on its jus once a year!)

  2. elvingiri said

    balnu147…bugger…twas my bday..rem…everyone ran like rats only that day…pandey started orkuting…u..of all places…got into the loo!!!in the commotion…gaurav bhai could not run…so hes like…”Pleeejh saar…we are celebraaating firands burthday…”…ha ha ha…adn rem…that MIT faculty came with a lungi…n that also he was holding up with his hands…man…we had fun today…

  3. elvingiri said

    i mean that day!!!!

  4. | Balu | said


    had fun though.. (i thought it was amit’s b’day. chalo neways no probs..)

    wat magic words did u utter from ur cake smeared face?

  5. Gaurav said

    Ara mamu loge cheeta ka photo to lagaya hai uske baad bhi colour pooch raha hai…………carefully cheeta ka colour dekho and leave a comment so that mujhe bhi mpata chal jayaga.. ha ha ha

  6. | Balu | said


    Jeetu bhaiyya… ur turn to comment nw!

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